IT SEEMS LIKE JUST YESTERDAY, WHEN I WAS LUCKY ENOUGH TO WALK THE RUNWAY WEARING THE COVETED CROWN OF 1974 AHOY. .
TODAY, I'M JUST A BROWN MEMORY, HEH-HEH. NEVERTHELESS, I AM PROUD TO STAND BEFORE YOU AND SAY...
"AHOY THERE!"
WE'RE GOING TO ELECT A NEW ASS HOLE OF THE YEAR!
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DUE TO A TIE IN ROUND 2, THE FIELD NOW STANDS AT 17!
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ON CHRISTMAS EVE, IT WILL BE REDUCED TO EIGHT.
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I URGE YOU TO VOTE. I BEG YOU TO VOTE. BECAUSE SOME LUCKY MAN OR WOMAN RIGHT NOW IS DREAMING OF HEARING THOSE MAGIC WORDS...
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"LADIES AND GENTLEMAN, GREET YOUR NEW REIGNING "ASS HOLE OF THE WORLD."
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BECAUSE ONLY IF YOU HAVE BEEN IN THE DEEPEST VALLEY CAN YOU EVER KNOW HOW MAGNIFICENT IT IS TO BE THE AHOY.
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MAY GOD BLESS EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU,
.
RN
